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About

Ashlee is Mama of one darling boy. A 28 week early bird, now 1 and some change, doing beautifully. She lives near Chicago with her sweetheart husband and French Bulldog. She's a thinker not afraid to get her silly on. Babywearer, veggie queen, photography nut. Before the domestic days Ashlee was pursuing a future in developmental psychology but has happily shifted gears in favor of staying at home and couldn't imagine doing anything else. In her free time (ha!) you can find her whipping up babyslings, holding down the fort at Mama Speaks and spotlighting as an Itsy Bitsy Yoga Instructor.

Days Like This...

My baby is sick. Projectilius Vomitus, triple digit heat, moans and groans and... giggles. It's days like today that I realize just how sloppy in love I still am. Those early days were easy, the newness, the novelty, the hormones - but over time it wears a little, only it doesn't, it tunnels, it deepens, this giddy glorious gush becomes a primal all encompassing adoration.

But it also becomes normal. When the days turn to weeks turn to months and now years! you get used to this little human being existing, amazing. And life happens, we do and move and busy. We live. And then it hits me, I realize it's been a really long time since I've stopped to drink it all in. I'll never be able to write enough down, to photograph each instant I'd like would mean me behind a lens rather than in a moment, and memories fade too quickly... still there are too many blank pages in the baby book, too many posts here about me, about stuff, about nothing.

So rather than want to, I will, I am in this moment documenting glimpses of forever...

Dear Xavier, 25 months, 20 days, 25 Things that make me smile
  1. Absolutely comes out Abo-lutsey and is often combined with a random name, as in "Abolutsey Pastor Tim"
  2. The words "Ylang-Ylang" and Jockey illicit the biggest belly laughs I've ever seen
  3. I don't know when the imagination began, but now it never ends. To see food become animals you've only read about, random space shuttle sightings in our living room and tales of adventure that dwarfs that on the silver screen amazes me.
  4. You thought we should name Solomon, Yogurt, and will tell anyone who asks that he is not a dog but a "Dob-er-MAN puppy"
  5. Yesterday you said, "Guess what Mama?! I love you!"
  6. You made Papa fajita pancakes. My favorite.
  7. Spidey says "I lub You" and he does.
  8. Yoga.
  9. When the going gets tough, nonny still cures all.
  10. Boogie checks and belly buttons
  11. Our daily dinosaur assignments. Today you told me I could be Velociraptor (you were Allosaurus) Papa was T-Rex. My favorite? Mamasaurus
  12. Randomly, you'll tell me about angels, or Jesus. I struggle with our religion but you give me faith.
  13. Celebrating poop.
  14. You've asked me many times to have a baby in my belly so you can have a big sister. (let's keep talking about how that all works!)
  15. "Yowt-see!" (Yahtzee)
  16. Conversation. Words became sentences long ago and now paragraphs that I could listen to until the end of time. (and I will)
  17. Your honesty.
  18. Only time will tell what you'll "be" but the glimpses at your inherent gifts/likes/loves is awesome. Music, drumming!, painting, art, words.
  19. My one man band. Two drum sticks and a microphone.
  20. Your sometimes southern drawl.
  21. The way you touch my cheeks and play with my hair and give me hugs and kisses. Those unsolicited "Mama IS pretty" comments don't hurt either.
  22. If I forget to buckle you in your highchair you push yourself away from the table and say "I'm sorry Mama, it's ok" (I sometimes forget on purpose just so I can hear you say it)
  23. The way your eyebrows furrow and your lips pucker when Papa leaves for work. "Where'd Papa go'd?" and the smile when "Papa IS home!"
  24. No matter how silly, tired, squeezy, frustrated, stinky or happy I get, you want to be right by my side. (I wouldn't want to be anywhere else)
  25. You love like I've never seen love before. People, animals, everyone, everything, unconditionally.

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  • Blogger Glass Half Full says so:
    4:10 PM  

    Matt is sick here too with a horrible cough and ear infection. Ick.

    Your post was SWEET!

    Lori top

  • Blogger To Think is to Create says so:
    6:48 PM  

    Oh man, those pics are incredible! Such a special gift, that X.

    Love the "it tunnels..." so true! top

  • Blogger To Think is to Create says so:
    6:49 PM  

    Oh and P.S. sometimes it seems like Charlie is from Brooklyn! top

  • Blogger Butterfly Mama says so:
    10:32 PM  

    You are so right, it goes about how the awe transforms. Daily. Wow. Xavier has just a wonderful spirit.

    Heidi top

  • Anonymous Beth says so:
    9:23 AM  

    Thank you for reminding me to stop and look and SEE. Oh boy, I needed that.

    The imagination - that first time a cracker becomes a duck - that's my FAVORITE. top

  • Blogger Because Everything Matters says so:
    8:43 PM  

    I have learned more from my children than I ever thought. I have learned more about myself. Most importantly, it's so awesome to see that they are people with their own thoughts, agendas, and minds.... Oh.... what an exciting ride, and am so glad you're on it! With a fellow mama! top